The Morning Rain Clouds Up My Window
by Airin
Summary: A fic written for my Snape Sisters. Airin is bored and wants to go to the Pub. High jinks and Sevvy-ness ensues...
1. The Morning Rain Clouds Up My Window

This fic is happily dedicated to all of my Snape Sisters who keep me sane when my "real" life heads towards the u-bend in the toilet bowl, (e.g. exam periods, flatmate hassles and best friend-in-hospital moments). I could name them here, but then a lot of them are in this fic, and I can't be bothered. :D  
  
For those who don't know, the Snape Sisters are the members of the Severus Snape Fan Club on the Cinescape Messageboard. I'm halfway through new chapters for "Forbidden" and "Artistic hands" and as both are fairly angsty I wanted to write something fun.  
  
Any of the HP characters in this fic do not belong to me. They belong to JKR. Any other person named belongs to themselves (I hope!!), but the idea has come purely from my deranged head. Being a physicist I am fully licensed to throw the laws of physics out of the window, so if anything unrealistic happens it's because it's my fic and I can write whatever I want!!! Mwahahahahaha!!  
  
The title is taken from the song "Thank you" by Dido.  
  
- The Morning Rain Clouds up my Window -  
  
Airin was lying on the top of her bed, face down into a pillow. She'd gotten up, put in her contact lenses and realised that she had nothing to do. Hence the flop onto the bed. She pushed herself back up and walked over to the window, still in her dressing gown. She pulled back the curtain and looked out at a rain-soaked Bristol (England) morning. Well, almost morning. About an hour past morning if she was totally honest. So much for that 11 am lecture...  
  
A snippet of a song came into Airin's head, inspired by the 'lovely' day.  
  
"My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I, got out of bed at all. The morning rain clouds up my window, and I can't see at all."  
  
A perfect description for how she felt.  
  
Maybe reading a book. Her eyes flicked over to her pile of lecture notes in the corner and she laughed. Yeah right!!! Like she would actually do work! Heh heh heh. She pulled an Anne McCaffrey book off the shelf. Airin had read it lots of time before, but it still rated higher than studying. Mind you, rectal surgery rated higher than studying, so no contest really.  
  
The whole shelf collapsed. Books and videos covered the floor and her feet. She stood staring at it for five minutes.  
  
"Bugger."  
  
Airin looked at the book still in her hand, shrugged, and threw it on the top of the pile. So much for reading. A ham sandwich. With sandwich pickle. Yup. That was a perfect idea. A part of her brain explained that a ham sandwich was not good breakfast food, but section that had witnessed the total collapse of her bookshelf battered it into submission. She walked towards the door to her room and accidentally kicked the desk. Her little toe exploded in agony.  
  
"Shit!!" The expletive was shouted fairly impressively considering the nerves in her toe were taking up so much of her brain's attention. She grabbed her foot in her hand, tried to balance on one foot, failed, and fell over backwards. Lying on the floor, foot still in hand Airin decided that maybe getting out of bed at all today had been a bad idea. When her spine had decided to let her move again, and her toe had throbbed itself out, she would get up and get back under the quilt.  
  
It was at this precise moment that Airin spotted a huge black spider crawling towards her head. Her brain seemed to do a fairly rapid assessment of the situation. Possible paralysation due to getting up, or being crawled over by that fucking great spider. She shot to her feet faster than she had fallen off them and leapt up onto her bed, shrieking like a girl. She was a girl, so figured it was allowed. This was when Airin remembered the fact that the bottom of her double bed was broken. A casualty of her last party when her and four drunken friends left at the end of the night had ended up in a bizarre wrestling match. Her feet disappeared with a sharp sounding 'crack'.  
  
It must be karma, Airin decided. Punishment for sleeping instead of toiling up the huge hill into uni. She managed to disentangle her feet from the broken wood and grabbed a glass to put over the spider. She wanted to kill it; one less to worry about, but her conscience wouldn't let her. Plus she had enough bad karma to worry about it seemed!! She slipped a card underneath the glass and carried the nasty, invading arachnid out into the back garden, admonishing it to never come back, much to the amusement of her neighbour.  
  
Back inside Airin did a quick reconnaissance to check that the spider had been a lone patrol and not one of a larger unit. No multi-legged creatures seemed to be in evidence so she got dressed. She looked over at her dark red teddy, Tyrian, who seemed to be watching her from his post at the head of her bed.  
  
"I'm going to the pub Tyrian. If any more spiders come back, you get rid of them OK?" The teddy seemed to radiate understanding and willingness to stand between his mistress and certain death by spider infestation. Or at least in her head he did, which was good enough for her. Suddenly she noticed that the sun seemed to be coming out. Airin ran over to the bay window and flung open the curtains. Ah ha!! Maybe this was fate's way of telling her that the pub idea was a good one. She marched through to her flatmate's room, fully intending to drag her away from whatever task she was doing so that Airin could treat her injured toe and spine with a pint of carling.  
  
The room was empty.  
  
"Arse arse arse arse arse." Airin kicked over her flatmate's inflatable champagne bottle, felt guilty for doing so, and picked it back up. Then she kicked over again. She had forgotten that her flatmate was teaching today. It was only the day before that she'd had off. Airin mooched back to her own room and sat despondently on her chair. A good plan gone to waste. She could call up some of her friends from uni to ask if they wanted to go for a drink, but she knew most of them had a lot of work to do. She turned in the chair to face her computer. She wanted company!  
  
An idea sparked inside her head, shouldering aside the residual thoughts on how much her toe hurt, and stamping all over the going back to bed idea. She thought about it.  
  
"Nah." Airin tried to quash the idea, but it proved resilient. She thought about it some more, but it was not possible, so she tried to think about something else. The idea proved as difficult to get rid of as a bloodsucking relative at Christmas.  
  
Airin jumped to her feet and ran to look through the bottom of her wardrobe. It was in here somewhere... ah ha!! She pulled out a huge spell book that she'd bought on a whim a few years before in a little, atmospheric back-alley shop. She set it down on her desk, shoving unpaid bills, paper and her stereo remote control out of the way. Then she rummaged through her drawer and pulled out the wand the best friend had bought her for Christmas as a joke. It lit up at the end when you flicked it, but that could be ignored. She poured over the book for half an hour or so, before sitting back laughing. Well it was worth a try!! She knew exactly the people she wanted to go to the pub with, but they were not here. So she would bring them here! 


	2. The Summoning

I decided to put this in chapters to make it easier to read, as it has proved longer than I anticipated!  
  
Again, the HP characters belong to JKR, and the rest belong to themselves. I intend to make no money from the use of these characters. Dagnabit. *grins evilly*  
  
- The Summoning -  
  
Airin stood in her room with a temporary (she hoped) pentigram drawn on her carpet. She was counting on it coming out afterwards or her landlord might prove unamused. She had the spell book to the side and the wand in her hand. If she was to be perfectly honest with herself she felt bloody stupid. This was an insane idea. Even more insane than that time she'd gotten drunk and decided Simon Krane wasn't 'that' bad looking after all. She shuddered at the recollection. She still hadn't forgiven her flatmate for not stopping her.  
  
Well. Who first. She knew what SIG looked like, so she'd be easiest. Airin lit the candles around the room. They were not really necessary, but they made her feel more occult. And yes, slightly more stupid too. She stepped up to the pentigram and flicked her wand (little green light on the end flashing).  
  
"Uoynommus IGIS." She shouted, and waved her wand dramatically. Thank God she'd shut the curtains again because the last thing she wanted was a bunch of pedestrians witnessing her waving her arms about and shouting like Martin Riggs on heat.  
  
There was a sound like a wind blowing far away, and then a 'pop' as the air in the room moved grouchily to accommodate something that had not been there before. It didn't hold with all this something-from-nothing malarkey.  
  
SIG stood in the pentigram in full hockey outfit with a hockey stick in her hands, pulled fresh from Manchester university. She looked around the room wildly before noticing Airin. She blinked a couple of times and then looked down at the pentigram, brain working almost audibly. There was a 'click' in her mind and she looked back up.  
  
"Shit." She said simply. She then swung and tried to hit Airin with the stick. Airin ducked.  
  
"Oi! Quit it!" She shouted, trying to avoid a second swing.  
  
"I was about to score the winning goal to idiot!" SIG cried, stepping out of the pentigram.  
  
"But I wanted to go to the pub." Airin replied in a quiet voice. SIG stopped.  
  
"Pub eh?" She threw down the hockey stick. "Well why didn't you say so!" She grinned at Airin. Airin explained her plan to bring as many of the Snape Sisters as possible here to go to the pub, and SIG backed up the plan 100%. Alcohol + Snape Sisters = a great time, in her book. They decided the next person bring would be Bally.  
  
"Uoynommus Iyllab!" More wind, longer this time, and another 'pop'. A green-haired girl of about 19 stood in the pentigram holding a paintbrush. She frowned and looked suspiciously at the brush in her hand muttering something about paint fumes. SIG ran forward and hugged her shouting "Bally!!", Airin following suit. Bally backed away looking scared before stopping to peer at the two girls in front of her.  
  
"SIG? Airin?!" She sounded incredulous. Airin explained her plan. Bally shrugged. "Why not?"  
  
"Uh, Ball," Airin began, remembering the six hour time difference between the UK and the area of the US that Bally lived in, "what are you doing painting at 8 am?" Bally threw the paintbrush at Airin.  
  
"How the hell am I supposed to know?" She said. "This is your friggin fic. It must be your minds idea of what art majors do. I wanted a lie-in too." Airin shrugged. Ah well. Next.  
  
The next Snape Sister pulled through was SSK, who seemed to have no trouble at all with the sudden transferral across half the country. Her children at school, an afternoon in the pub seemed a great idea.  
  
Then came Lily, her American southern accent causing a few laughs when she spotted SSK for the first time and hugged her shouting, "Honey!! It's great to finally meet you!"  
  
Ivy was pulled through from Israel, and immediately threatened Airin with dismemberment. Airin guessed she must be as sadistic in real life as she seemed.  
  
Abby (Weasleyfan) and Abby (Abzita...now known as Abs) came through together after Airin shouted "Uoynommus Iybba!". Obviously the spell hadn't known which one she meant. She was just thankful that they had materialised separately, images of the film "The Fly" swimming around her head. Abby and Abs seemed pretty glad too.  
  
Airin pulled through Gryff, Mag and HRB successively, By this time there were some fairly interesting conversations going on, mostly Snape related, but some discussing the implications of Airin's sudden ability to make people appear using a wand with a flashing green light at the end. SSK and Lily had found a corner and the occasional "Oliver" "Viktor" and "Ivan" could be heard. Ivy came and pointed out to Airin that her bed was broken, and that she suspected Bally had done it. Bally immediately pointed an accusing finger at Abby who growled at her. SIG pointed out the fact that she knew the bed had been broken before. Bally poked her for ruining her fun.  
  
Airin summoned the next Sister.  
  
"Uoynommus Ignim!" Wind, 'pop'. Ming stood in the pentigram and burst into an amazingly good rendition of "About a Girl" by Nirvana. Airin frowned at her wand and shook it to see if it was broken. HRB laughed and pointed at the less than respectful green flashing light at the end of it. Airin frowned at her instead.  
  
Ming stopped singing and grinned at the confusion she had caused. They heard something along the lines of "Fight fire with fire" from her before she spotted Airin's HP books and pulled out the first one, finding the Snape bits and reading them out loud.  
  
Airin summoned Poisonivy next. The 24 year old couldn't seem to quite grasp the sudden transportation to be surrounded by a bunch of strangers who seemed to know her.  
  
Last she pulled through Tobias. The woman appeared from Canada and seemed greatly thankful for not having to teach that day, but rather become inebriated with her fellow Snape Sisters.  
  
The noise in Airin's room was now at fever pitch. Everyone had something to say and were laughing often. This was much better than she'd imagined!! Ivy and HRB were searching through Airin's videos, still on the floor, for any with Alan Rickman in. SSK and Lily had found the sticker book and were hunting for stickers of Oliver to steal. Mag and Bally were talking to each other in French, while all the others were chatting about the Snape bits that Ming was still reading out. Airin grinned with content. She'd suddenly had a fantastic idea. 


	3. Bright Ideas

*sigh* they're not mine OK? I know that. They're JKR's. But what fun would I have if they were. ;) *chuckles*  
  
And btw.......if I make jokes about nationality, sexuality, etc. it is not because I disrespect them in any way. I myself am mostly Scottish with some Irish, and was brought up for a lot of my life in England. I have Canadian, South African and German relatives and have so open a mind when it comes to sexuality that sometimes I think my brains may fall out!! I may, however, use some stereotypes from a humorous point of view. Thanks!  
  
- Bright ideas -  
  
The noise from the Snape Sisters was formidable. A pub would kick them out for being this loud. But it didn't matter. Airin had a better idea. She rifled through the spell book again, dodging the pieces of paper SIG was throwing at her to get her attention. Finally SIG picked up Tyrian and threatened to hide him. Before she realised what was happening Airin had dived on top of her to wrestle the helpless teddy from the evil grasp of Siggy. SIG began to tickle Airin, who accidentally kicked Gryff in the face.  
  
"Bitch!" Gryff shouted, and leapt into the fray. Somewhere beneath her tickle-enraged mind Airin guessed this wouldn't be doing her mortally wounded bed any good. Bally decided that two against one was unfair and tried to tickle SIG, to no avail. She wasn't ticklish!! She tried Gryff instead who collapsed into a laughing heap, pulling Bally down with her.  
  
Within minutes everyone was tickling or tripping someone else, rolling around and biting any obtainable area of flesh. The whole bed gave way and tumbled the writhing mass of Snape fans onto the floor where they all lay laughing. From somewhere under Tobias's foot and SSK's stomach, SIG's voice sounded.  
  
"That'll teach you to ignore us Airin. We killed your bed!" They all laughed again, trying to get up without treading on anyone else's head or fingers. A scream from Abs indicated someone's failure on this point.  
  
Airin remembered that she had been doing something. Oh yeah......the spell book. She looked back at the page and shouted again, waving the wand. The rest of the Snape sisters watched her with trepidation. Poisonivy made a "nutter" motion to the rest, who seemed to agree.  
  
"Uoynommus Ilohocla!". The wind sound seemed different this time and everyone backed away from the pentigram, Bally and Lily searching around for the nearest exit. The 'pop' sounded and there in the pentigram were more alcoholic drinks than seen an Irish off-licence. Bally and Airin being part Irish made noises like a starving man in an Italian restaurant. It was a close call as to who got to the drinks first out of the two. Abs pointed out that she and a couple of others were underage, to which Airin happily told her that in the UK it was legal to drink on private property as long as you were over the age of 12 and had legal guardians there. OK, so she was not exactly a legal guardian, but who was going to tell?  
  
Once everyone had a drink they all tried to find somewhere to sit. With the bed being a casualty of war, it left only the desk chair (otherwise known as the "angry chair" because it was so uncomfortable that sitting on it made you just that), the granddad chair (so hideously wonderful to sit in that it prompted homicidal jealously from the rest) and the floor (most of which was taken up by the permanently subdued bed). Airin grinned and pulled out her (ridiculous) wand again. She chanted a few unintelligible words and the room began to grow. The broken bed morphed into a huge dark green sofa. The room grew more, and additional sofas appeared. A low coffee table sprouted in the middle of the now vast room, upon which the pentigram was sketched, and the drinks sat around. The air made a rushing sound, severely pissed off at all the new space it was having to occupy and the materialising furniture. The Snape Sisters stared alternately between the modified room and Airin. SSK dropped onto the sofa nearest to her, exclaiming at the comfort.  
  
"How the hell did you that!?" She asked as the others sat down, Mag warily in case the sofa disappeared as suddenly as it had come into being. Ivy was also watching carefully, not trusting that she wouldn't end up thudding to floor.  
  
"Well, I realised that this is my fic, and if I can bring you guys here, then there are many other things possible!" Airin pondered the possibilities, ideas suddenly forming so clearly that she wondered why it hadn't occurred to her before. She was pulled out of her reverie by Ming and Bally arguing over who would get the last bottle of Bud. She waved her wand again, six crates of Bud arriving in the middle of the table, which groaned alarmingly. They all quickly dragged it onto the floor. Airin stood up again.  
  
"I have an idea guys." She said, looking cunning. "None of us are really dressed for the occasion though." She waved the wand again (some of the Sisters rightly thinking that she just enjoyed the flashing green light) and their clothes mutated. Out of the blue they were all sitting in beautiful, elegant, but practical, dresses. They were all varying shades of green, and varying styles, but similar enough to mark them as a group. Tobias stood up to look at her dark green, Basque-style gown, twirling in feminine joy and the skirt. The others followed suit. Each dress showed off their figures to their best advantage. Airin was standing in a forest green, lace-up the front dress that gave her a cleavage people could probably live comfortably in. Bally decided it could be used well as a shelf and tried to rest her drink on Airin's breasts. The drink sat canted at an angle. Airin tried to give Bally and evil look, but the fact that she was trying not to laugh made her look constipated.  
  
SIG stood with her dress on, hockey stick still in her hand. The combination was disturbing. She was not looking pleased.  
  
"You'd better be able to bring back my hockey uniform woman!" She said archly. Airin reassured her, though she had no idea what she was really doing.  
  
Lily managed to remember Airin's comment that had escaped the rest in their indulgence.  
  
"What occasion?" She asked, swigging out of a bottle of Blue WKD, her grand gesticulations suggesting she was a little tipsy already. Airin smiled with the air of one who knew her next action will cause uproar.  
  
"Uoynommus Isureves!" Some of the sharper Snape Sisters Immediately figured out from the spell what Airin had summoned. They watched the pentigram with baited breath. The not-so-bright sisters looked at one another and shrugged. The windy sound came again, but with a very different tone this time. It also went on for a lot longer. Airin was just coming to the conclusion that it wasn't going to work when there was a 'pop'.  
  
The man in the pentigram on the table was holding a small vial of clear liquid, and had a look on his face that would make serial killers look like fluffy bunnies. He spoke in icy tones, the words seeming to drop onto the floor with the sound of heavy slabs.  
  
"Just. Where. Am. I." SIG recovered first and leapt at the dark- haired man.  
  
"Master!" She shouted, delight and amazement warring for supremacy in her voice. It broke the other's paralysis. Severus Snape's look of anger transformed into one of pure terror as 13 green-clad women suddenly lunged for him. Under the circumstances his girlish shriek can be forgiven. He somehow managed to escape the grasping hands and put one of the newly obvious and ridiculously comfortable looking sofas between himself and the women.  
  
Snape looked about himself. Seconds before he had been mixing up a fresh batch of Veritaserum, and now he was no longer in his pleasantly light-less dungeon, humming to himself, but had somehow been apparated to a room full of green-clad crazy nymphomaniacs, from the outrageous suggestions they were making. This had to be Potter's doing, he thought darkly.  
  
{{{{{A/N OK... I'm not done yet, but I though this was a good point to put this up and have you all waiting to see what my plans are for our dear Sevvy. Stay tuned!!...  
  
...hmmmmmmm. What's that down there? Is that a review box? *peers closer* Why yes it is!! Will you look at that. Coincidence eh? *hint hint* :D}}}}} 


	4. I Discovered Alcohol

Characters not mine. Are JKR's. OK? :D  
  
And thanks to Bally for helping with a particularly dodgy simile, and laughing enough to keep me writing!! xx  
  
- I Discovered Alcohol -  
  
Snape sat in the corner trying not to enjoy the sight of 13 women in figure-enhancing outfits all talking about the fabulous shape of his nose. His hand stroked it self-consciously. The Snape Sisters had fairly rapidly realised that this man was not going to be very friendly and had decided to use reverse psychology on him. I.e. they were ignoring him. He, for one, was incredibly thankful for the fact. The calculation for points off Gryffindor was already in the thousands. By his workings they would end this year, and many to come, in the minus bracket.  
  
Airin sat pondering over what would bring their Master out of his self-imposed exile to the dankest corner of her enhanced room. Everyone loved him for the very personality he was displaying, but the muttering was becoming distracting. There was only so many times they could hear "10 more points off now, and 600 detentions" before exasperation set in.  
  
Another idea formed in Airin's head. The brain cells laboured under all the new activity. It wasn't used to this much business, having planned to use the afternoon for a rousing round of golf with the lymphatic system. It would have to forfeit now. Airin stood up and waved her wand again.  
  
"Uoynommus Isuiris!" "Uoynommus Isumer!" She shouted, one after the other. The air moved again to accommodate two new figures. It sighed. She'd get fed up of it soon. Always did with these new fangled ideas.  
  
Sirius Black and Remus Lupin stared warily around the room. They both held pint glasses in their hands and Sirius raised his to his nose and sniffed at it suspiciously. Remus spotted Snape sitting in the corner staring at the newcomers as though they were the vile slime just crawled out of a swamp. Sirius caught his line of sight and followed it. He grinned and held his glass up in a silent toast, knocked back the last of the drink, and picked up a fresh one from the pile. He seemed to be handling the change in location with surprising ease. One place with alcohol and Remus, to another place with alcohol, Remus, Snape and 13 women. Where was the problem?  
  
HRB took his arm and led him to sit down. She then sat on his lap. Remus rolled his eyes before noticing that a younger looking girl (did someone say Ivy?) was eyeing him like a hungry tiger eyeing a rump steak. He edged away in Snape's direction, trying to be discrete. Snape snorted and turned his back on everyone. It was bad enough when it was just him, but these... these... men as well? He did not have a high opinion of these women. Inviting Black and Lupin. He sulked. 'What's wrong with just me?'  
  
Airin brought a drink over to Snape and sat it in front of him, smiling.  
  
"I don't want it." He was thirsty, but he didn't need such frivolities as a drink. Especially not a drink given to him by this strange green-flashing witch. Airin left it there anyway and turned to make Remus sit down. He was still a little wary of the hungry looks he was getting from the women, but Sirius' easy acceptance was encouraging and he picked up a drink.  
  
"So." He began as he sat on the edge of one of the idiotically green sofas. "Who are you? What are we doing here?" Sirius looked up from flirting with the nearest girls to him, HRB, Gryff and Bally (who had almost thrown Lily out of her way to sit next to the man.). He was mildly interested in what the answers were, but was definitely not bothered about the change in location. Not at all. Nope.  
  
Airin explained the situation, skirting around the whole "you don't actually exist except in books" bit. She didn't think the already tense Snape could take it. Sirius on the other hand was almost as inebriated as the now tipsy Sisters. He suddenly jumped to his feet, (a shocked HRB falling to the floor in an entirely non-elegant way) and leapt upon the coffee table. Beer in hand he burst into a Bare Naked Ladies song, strange backing music seeming to emanate from nowhere.  
  
"Alcohol, my permanent accessory,  
  
Alcohol, a part-time necessity,  
  
Alcohol, alternative to feeling like yourself,  
  
Oh Alcohol, I still drink to your health."  
  
At this point Remus, possessed of some musical-enforced necessity, jumped up on the table and began to grind along to the music next to Sirius. The Snape Sister began to dance around the table. Even Snape tried to stop his foot from tapping along by glaring at it.  
  
"I........love you more,  
  
than I did the week before,  
  
I discovered alcohol!"  
  
Snape's foot was out of control. The Laws of Musical Interaction were universal. Once someone begins to sing, with music coming from nowhere, everyone has to back-up dance. Snape's self control was proving to be a match, but in his annoyance with his rebellious foot he picked up and knocked back the drink Airin had provided. The almost pure alcohol in the heavily spiked drink hit Snape's bloodstream like a frat boy hitting a girls dorm, stripping off the last of his control. As Sirius jived into the next verse of the song, Snape joined the Snape Sisters in their synchronised dance, his face blacker than a black cat on a black car on a starless night.  
  
"I thought that alcohol was just for those with nothing else to do,  
  
I though that drinking just to get drunk was a waste of precious booze,  
  
But now I find that there's a time and there's a place where I can chose,  
  
To walk the fine line between self-control, and self-abuse."  
  
As the song ended, the last act performed synchronously was to throw back a shot of tequila. 'Oh God. It's all over.' The thought shot through Snape's mind. 'Over.' 


End file.
